Round 7 in a nutshell – carnage, carnage, carnage! It was never a good omen when one of our big dogs (Grundy) was ruled out for 10-12 weeks on Tuesday arvo. The we got the X-man out with a busted toenail and Hewett with an internal bruise… Okay, slightly under-selling the injuries but it got desperate there with coaches dealing with multiple forced trades and scrambling to get 22 on the park! We’re not supposed to be dealing with this in round 7…
If the weekend taught us anything, it is the importance of getting those spud rooks of our fields ASAP. You can’t be rolling with multiple scores of 30-50 and expect to match it with the big dogs! Unfortunately with all the carnage, our hands were forced and as a by-product of this, had to roll with several sub-par rook scores.
Plenty to rant and rave (mostly rant) about this week. Let’s dive in to the Weekend That Was – Round 7 edition!
Richmond vs Traffic Cones
Studs
Lynch (146) – At least the Traffic Cones had one win for the night… Traffic Cones 8.8 (56) def T.Lynch 7.5 (47). Imagine if he kicked straighter!
Bolton (136) – Got some kms in to the legs as well as bulk Fantasy points in a light training run… it was circle work at times out there and Bolton went massive for the first time this season! Fantasy tons won’t come much easier than this.
Short (123) – Just when you thought it couldn’t get any better as a Jayden Short owner he goes and attends centre bounces and takes the mickey out of 23 traffic cones! What dreams are made of.
Clark (110) – Wow, just wow! G.Clark has arrived! A mature-aged rook who averaged an absurd 115 in the WAFL last season finally got his chance and delivered big time. He’s probably one amongst a handful of Weagles that are not waving the white flag… Will be the most traded in player this week, particularly with a more favourable bye! The cherry on top was seeing Greg attend multiple centre-bounces in the last quarter!
Duds
Harry Edwards (Eagles defender who finished 10th in AFL Fantasy 2021 and had 53 on Friday night) in the preseason: “I won’t be picking any of my team mates, none of them are relevant this season.” Couldn’t have said it better myself Harry, although I’d add that the whole establishment is irrelevant at this point! Labelling them traffic cones is an insult to all traffic cones! How on earth did these nincompoops get a Friday night game?!
‘Flyin’ (The White Flag) Ryan (27) –
Geelong vs Freo
Studs
Stewart (157) – BANG! The brick wall from Geelong racked up a monumental 40 disposals and 14 marks… What will please owners the most is Stew spent some time higher up the ground. Nice elite unique for his 9% of owners!
Stengle (87) – Really nice for those that were forced to hold with the carnage that has been the theme of the past few weeks! 3 round average of 82 and elite cash gen for his owners!
De Koning (51) – First half-ton of his life I suspect… Heartbeat for owners but don’t chasing cancer and trading him in!
Duds
Brayshaw (83) – It pains me to do this Bray… but having the ‘most expensive’ tag comes with expectation, as in expectation to ton on the regular. Tough matchup vs Geelong @ GMHBAIDGAF Stadium and it’s a definite hold!
Duncan (69) – What on earth has happened to Mitch Duncan?! The guy was supposed to be a shoe-in for a top 6 forward in 2022 prior to… he’s gone on to average a measly 81 and can’t buy a 25+ disposal game! Won’t be long until he checks into the retirement village with 22 of his mates…
Dempsey (11) – 48 as a forward vs Norf should have been warning enough not to jump on… The guy beat his breakeven by 2 and it’s only his second game! Deadweight.
Adelaide vs GWS
Studs
Kelly (134) – Now here’s that ceiling we know Jelly his capable of! He entered the round >$800K and is only owned by 6% of the competition… I’d strongly consider if he didn’t have that sh*tty early bye.
Laird (118) – Yup, Adelaide got d*cked but Laird didn’t stop trying with 35 disposals and 7 tackles. Hasn’t gone under 90 in his 5 outings this season… Gun.
Dawson (106) – Okay, it always helps when the ball lives in D50 but hey, someones gotta do the kicking. At Crom, Dawson is the man – music to the ears of fantasy coaches far and wide!
Cogs (105) – Still lacking midfield time but it doesn’t tend to matter when your side has 28 scoring shots… 3 snags in his 20 disposals and 7 tackles. When have they got the traffic cones???
Preuss (95) – Must be nice… Big Preussy has been nothing short of awesome (except for that one-week holiday) since coming in for round 3 vs Gold Coast! Those who held him at R3 and traded Grundy appear to have a reliable R2 leading into the byes…
Duds
Green (74) – Watching this game, I couldn’t believe Green only managed 74 points! Not sure, maybe it was Derm having a stiffy in the commentary box every time Greeny went near the pill that did it! If ever there was a reason to use the ‘mute’ button on my remote…
Haynes (50) – He’s gone from a guy that teams plan for to a passenger in the space of 6 months… And it’s reflecting in his paltry average of 60 fantasy points.
Rachele (43) – This could have been disastrous if Rachele had not spent a bit of time on ball in the last quarter… cheers Nicksy! Sadly, many of us were forced to hold with carnage central and these 40’s are starting to hurt both on the scoreboard and in the cash gen department.
Melbourne vs Hawthorn
Studs
Max (149) – Never. In. Doubt. Gee he’s really turned his life around since he got caught smoking on the way to training back in 2010! Now he’s a premiership captain, taking the piss out of opposing ruck men and kicking snags for fun outside 50! If you traded a few weeks ago, stick a fork in your season – you’re cooked! 29 disposals for a ruck man – sheesh!
Moore (138) – If you told me at the start of the season that Dyl Moore would be pushing a triple figure average at round 7 I’d say you’re dreaming… Probably more an indication of how much of a spud I am! Had an enormous 15 disposal Q3 playing up the field! Huge for his 1% of owners.
Clarry (126) – Who would’ve thought… another gun mid going 120+ on the Hawks! Amazingly, he had a couple of quiet patches throughout the game so this could have been sooo much more for Clarry.
Sic Dawg (114) – Sickening. Another dominant Sic Dawg performance and yet another F you to the Juggernauts and the other 50% of morons who didn’t pick him. Racking up cheap +6’s for fun with the odd intercept! Has barely defended in his life but coaches won’t give a rats toss bag if he continues this stellar form!
Duds
Wingard (65) –
Maginness (39) – 7 rounds in…. And I still don’t know who the f*ck you are, Finn.
Callow (23) – Debutant with 63% time on ground… tells you everything you need to know! Don’t do it to yourself.
Smith (19) – This really hurts for Joel’s 16% owners… was subbed off in Q3. Strangely, we are none the wiser on the actual injury with stand-in coach Adam Yze’s 3 qtr time update of “Yes, Joel is injured.” Yeah thanks Uce! His cash gen is dead anyway so ta-da Smithers.
St Kilda vs Port
Studs
Steele (115) – Make it 7/7 tons for the man of Steele! In a very uninspiring contest, Steeley got the job done once again with 27 disposals, 5 marks and a trademark 8 tackles.
Wanganeen-Milera (81) – With the defender rook situation so dire, Nas has been solid for his owners thus far, culminating in a season best 81 on Saturday night! Huge upside there and awesome cash gen for owners.
Duds
Butters (74) – Yeah okay so it’s not 34 type of bad… but c’mon Zac, coaches who were forced to hold you deserve better! Has to be treading on this ice for owners – the fact he has the early bye may be the final nail in the coffin!
Marshall (37) –
Carlton vs Norf
Studs
Cripps (125) –
McKay (110) – Harry sh*tting all over a hapless Norf defence without twin bro Ben? Predictable. Backed up a woeful 23 points vs Freo with 4 goals in 15 possessions and 11 marks.
Carroll (87) – Another awesome score from a debutant – this time Jack Carroll. Sadly I didn’t get a great look at this game but he would have to be high on your radar if he can maintain this scoring… $234K mid for those wondering.
Duds
JHF (52) – Perhaps a little tough on the #1 pick, but this is his lowest score of the year… Only played 68% of the game so hopefully this is how the Roos are managing his minutes as opposed to a week off! Cash gen will really dry up now so feel free to thank JHF for his services and pull the trigger.
Ziebell (44) – Wow. This has been a drop off of epic proportions… A prime example of why it pays to pay attention to players role’s! Anyone playing as a forward for Norf is undeniably playing a sh*tty role! Poor bastards.
Collingwood vs Gold Coast
Studs
Miller (140) – Gun. You can’t keep a man of Touk’s quality down for long… He had multiple 2-3 minute patches throughout the game where he amassed 15-20 points! Fantasy gold. Won’t be an ‘under-priced premo’ for any longer so get in before his price heads north of $900K.
Crisp (130) – Essential, needed, required, key, important, crucial, vital, necessary! Enough said.
Adams (113) – Ayyyyyyy *bronx cheer*. A sarcastic cheer for a man struggling to complete a relatively mundane task – that being a fantasy ton! Incredibly, that 113 only bring his season average to 83.
Anderson (113) – Back-to-back tons for Noah who is starting to gain momentum as a mainstay in the Sunds midfield… Brings his season average to 98 which won’t be enough to trouble the top 10 mids, but is one to watch in the future!
Duds
De Goey (56) – Hahaha nice one Jordy! Looks like all that offseason training running from the authorities has worn off… Might be time for another midseason trip to the US!
Rosas (45) – It was all looking like sunshine and lollipops when Rosas strung together a 3 minute patch of 15 points to get to 33 halfway through the 2nd qtr. He then did the equivalent of watch paint dry, managing a paltry 12 points for the rest of the game. Congrats Malcolm, big Coxy and his speed dealerz would be proud of you!
Rankine (11) – Speaking of someone big Coxy would be proud of… Anyone remember when this bloke burst on to the scene in 2020? Hasn’t fired a shot since.
Western Bulldogs vs Essendon
Studs
Dunkley (133) – This man is literally floating on air at the moment… He averages 122! He’s a top 5 player in the game at this point and we can have him as a forward?! Ludicrous but we love it!
Alpha Martin (91) – Just Alpha doing Alpha tings. This scores brings him on par with Nick Daicos and will challenge for rook of the year! At this stage he is almost certainly the last rook you’re moving on! Legend in every sense of the word.
McComb (81) – Speaking of legends! We all know McComb knows to find the footy as illustrated by his VFL form, but to transfer it to AFL level is a new challenge altogether. McComb has looked solid since he came in last week… A ready-made, mature body making his way in the big time! Another bargain basement rookie for coaches to jump on. Hallelujah!
Duds
Treloar (78) – Let’s cast our minds back to the preseason where we had our conundrum with selecting Dogs players. Who was going to play the most midfield time? Will anyone be spared the Bevo treatment? They’ve got Libba, Macrae, Bont, Balenka, Dunks, Treloar… F*ck me, I hope you didn’t end up going Trelly over Dunks… it has cost you 30 points per week on average!
Baldwin (35) – Do you ever just watch a game of footy and go, “How is this bloke getting a run at AFL level?” Ironic statement from yours truly given my own form playing first grade footy in Canberra in the past!
Hobbs (30) – Ffs Hobbsy, really mate?! Can’t believe I picked this muppet over McComb… And to add insult to injury, he cost me $100k more. Potato.
Sydney vs Brisbane Lions
Studs
Neale (142) – Vintage Choccie! There’s that ceiling we all know and love… buttered up with 37 disposal, 9 tackles and a goal. Sydney seemed content to allow Neale to roam around and do whatever the hell he wanted and paid for it dearly.
Mills (131) – Another big C.Mills ton… was it ever in doubt? A legend in every sense of the word and only needed 77% time on ground! At $928K, the ship has probably sailed for non-owners. I wouldn’t be expecting a sharp price drop anytime soon though.
Ladhams (97) – Ladhams was the solution for a number of coaches caught up in the Grundy conundrum… you’re taking 97 every day of the year! Solo ruck role should remain with Hickey out for a few more weeks.
Duds
Lloyd (71) – Refer to ‘The Juggernaut Review’ for his dressing down…
Blakey (64) – A ‘solution’ the D6 conundrum has left owners with an absolute headache… Not even a panadol ‘optizorb’ could remedy this eyesore.
McInerney (61) –
The Juggernaut Review
2147. Yeah, it sounds okay until you realise you have made absolutely no ground and are floundering back at rank 15,000!
Again, 2/3 league wins sounds okay until you dig a little deeper and realise that one loss was to the tune of 250 points! Might well rename my team “Glorified Traffic Cones”! Wouldn’t be far off as this point. Seriously… in what universe do you run your own fantasy site and proceed to get d*cked in what can only be described a percentage booster! Laughable.
So, as you avid fans may recall, in round 3 I decided to do a re-shuffle to get my mate, the wanker space cadet himself, Sam Skinner off my field so that D6 position would no longer give me AIDS. Enter Jakey f*cking Lloyd…
I had an opportunity to save $200K and conform with 50% of the competition (AKA astute coaches) who own J.Sicily the Sic Dawg himself… but no, I decided to be a little smartass and go to who I thought was the keeper and more reliable option. Well, well, well… How has that turned out?! You can probably guess how it’s gone based on my rant but here are the number since round 3.
For those wondering, yes I’m keeping the faith… hopefully the almighty rev up and rage trade will kick Llooooooyd into gear! Either that or get BT back commentating on Swans game!
Righto, that’s it from me!
Thanks again legends and flex how you went in the comments!
Yours in Fantasy,
Fantasy Fanatic #70
Fantasy Fanatic 
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