Another round, another weekend of topsy-turvy scoring from our so called ‘premiums’ and more Covid chaos over in the West… We had bona fide captain options single-handedly ruin weekends and rooks struggling to crack the half-ton! Then we had others head and shoulders above the rest… Time to vent!
It’s Monday night… time for the Weekend That Was – Round 3 edition.
Western Bulldogs vs Sydney
Studs
English (138) – Big Timmy take a bow! Gee he moves well for a big fella and got his lick of the ice-cream with 24 disposals, 8 marks and 5 tackles – big dog numbers! He finally seems to be harnessing that potential that had him as the number #1 big man of his draft class in 2016. Many coaches went Gawn –> English this week, kudos if you did, you must have massive kahunas! Let’s hope he can sustain it. Important to note that the Swans were without a recognised ruck man when Hickey went down in Q3.
Dunkley (132) – 63% of astute coaches enjoying Dunks full time mid-role and 3/3 tons to start the season! Surely Bevo won’t stitch us up and change his role when he is and up and going like this!
Bazlenka (108) – A week out did nothing to slow down Baz… Is finally delivering some Fantasy scoring to match his rig!
Blakey (108) – Stocks have risen for the man affectionately known as ‘Lizard‘! Blakey has never averaged over 60 in a season but has put together 2×80’s and a ton over the first 3 weeks! Seems to have found a home at half-back and is even pinching some of Lloyd’s kick-ins! One to watch.
Duds
Mills (78) – It pains me to do this, but Callum… we can’t be paying $900K for beta scoring like this! By all means, rage trade away – just make sure you have reversed it come Thursday night!
Macrae (75) – Mac was on track for another low-ton with 76 to 3QT… What hope are we if a player of his ability is going backwards over 30 minutes of footy! Topped it off with a brain explosion (50m against) to almost single-handedly cost the Dogs the match!
Daniel (68) – Homunculus of a man, homunculus of a score…
Melbourne vs Essendon
Studs
Brayshaw (156) – Gus has burnt sooooo many coaches in past seasons… but credit where credit is due! Notched up an extraordinary 20 marks, becoming the 18th player in VFL/AFL history to do so. Point chasing here would be playing with fire…
Oliver (117) – Another week, another fantasy ton for the Fiery Ginger. Expect more of the same!
Max (101) – Slow start with 34 to HT until a rev up from my mate who was sitting in the top 1000 heading into round 3 clicked him into gear – Cheers Laffy! Long overdue from the big man and for those who have held firm, it better be a sign of things to come.
Duds
Petracca (83) – Rare feature in the Duds section for CP5. You were awesome in the first two weeks Christian, however, no one is safe even after a semi-decent performance!
Stringer (62) – *Package undeliverable…*
Neal-Bullen (36) – Backs up a huge 117 with a putrid 36… Fun fact – ANB had a 5 game patch in 2017 where he averaged 100 – he then went on to average 75 for the rest of the season! About as consistent as my sh*t after curry night.
Draper (28) – Seriously, who pays to go and watch a big blonk dawdle around a footy field for 120 minutes…? This begs another question: What was all the preseason hype about??? Imagine if he didn’t have his 19 hitouts… *shudders* 7% of the competition with a complete deadweight at R2.
Adelaide vs Port Adelaide
Studs
ROB (115) – That’s more like it ROB! His competitiveness around the footy has always been a strength with the big man laying 9 tackles for the night.
Wines (111) and Boak (108) – Wines and Boak once again carrying a sack of a football side… Boak’s behind late in the piece turned out to be very costly… did someone say Owen three? Never tear us apart until Crom beat us in a showdown after the siren – Cash Cow with Kochie will be good viewing this week!
Schoenberg (108) – Niiiiiccce Harry! Schoenberg was touted by many in the preseason to have greater responsibility in the Crom midfield in 2022… Good signs but we need to see some consistency before selecting, however.
Jordan Dawson (100) – Clutch from J.Dawson. Buddy would have been proud of the right-to-left on that kick! Amazingly, that was probably one of Dawson’s worst kicks off the boot for the night, yet still delivered in a big moment!
Duds
Houston (68) –
Butters (59) – Yuck. If Zac wants to push toward that ‘reliable premium’ status, he can’t be dishing up sub 60 scores every 2nd or 3rd week! Be better, Zac.
Powell-Pepper (43) – Shiny UFO head wanted more time in the midfield coming into season 2022… Yeah… just let that sink in.
Skinner (33) – Thank f*ck I got this space cadet off my field this week! Went from D6 to D8 veerrrry quickly! Will be lucky to peak at $250K the way he is going… Came off with an ankle injury in the second half but still played 66% of the game!
Jones (21) – If you somehow have this genuine vegetable in your side… proceed to delete team – if you need a hand with that I know a guy!
GWS vs Gold Coast
Studs
Taranto (126) – Another big f*ck you to John’s Juggernauts from TT… Hard to watch him rack up and even worse to see him playing more midfield minutes. An absolute no brainer and will without doubt be a top-3 forward.
Green (114) – Ladies and gentlemen, Tom Green has arrived. 3/3 fantasy tons and yes it is early in the season but he’s a smoky for the All-Australian squad in my mind! A bull around the stoppages and his footy IQ is right up there with the best.
Cogs (114) – Seemed to be playing predominantly as a high half-forward roaming into the stoppages… started the game on fire with 12 touches in Q1 and did not slow down! I did a bit of a restructure myself and unfortunately Cogs was it… time will tell if it was the right call – early signs point to Cogs making a fool out of me!
Preuss (108) – Big Preussy made the most of his first crack at the #1 ruck spot! Should be some good cash generation on the way regardless of whether Leon decides to d*ck around with his rucks… he has history!
Duds
Gold Coast. The whole establishment… not one of these fruit loops cracked 90 points! Where do I start…?
Miller (68) – Yeah okay… he did cop a double tag from De Boer and Ash, however, thousands of coaches were backing Touk in with the C. Let’s just hope other teams don’t cotton on to this successful tactic and we see Touk roam with freedom again next week!
Witts (64) – Fools gold. Dim-witted selection.
Anderson (55) – Gee this guy teases up with some epic performances… then comes up with this in the following week or two! Typifies where the Suns are at… new candidate for the yeo-yeo label.
Ellis (53) – 0.23% ownership and rightfully so! Couldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him.
Graham (4) – Never seen a guy try and avoid the pill as much as Graham did today… some would have him on the bench as a heartbeat – fair to say that heartbeat is on life support!
Collingwood vs Geelong
Studs
Stewart (102) – We knew it wouldn’t take Stew long to find his feet in 2022! A classic, reliable Stew performance with 22 kicks and 5 marks. First of many tons this year I suspect for the All-Australian defender.
Cameron (101) – 5 goals down a 3QT – enter J.Cameron. Turned the game on its head with 3 of his 6 goals coming in a final quarter avalanche! Credit where credit is due… but Fantasy 101: Steer clear of key forwards.
N.Daicos (89) – Did you know? Daicos currently averages 14 more points per game than his team mate, Mr Chalk himself, Taylor Adams! You paid $846K for Adams and $284K for Daicos… He’s a lock in any side taking Fantasy seriously!
Duds
Sidebottom (68) – Wayyy past him prime now is Sidebum… Living in 2017 if you picked him!
De Koning (32) – You’d think he’s still concussed given some of his efforts at catching a ball uncontested! I think 30’s is about all we can expect from SDK – bench, bench, bench!
Ginnivan (26) – That performance was about as good as your hair Jack! Absolute wank.
Brisbane vs North Melbourne
Studs
Lyons (122) – The Lyons we know and love was back with 24 disposals, 8 marks and 2 goals! Coaches paid close to $1m to start of the season and he owes his loyal owners a few big tons!
McLuggage (109) – Another guy who owes us a few big scores! A good all-round game from Luggage beating up on Kangas side who looked like they belonged in the NEAFL… 29 touches, 6 marks, 4 tackles.
Zorko (106) – Looked like he was running around with a carrot up his ass… apparently it is related to an accumulation of scar tissue from a minor achilles surgery last month! 28 disposals, 10 marks, 0 sprint efforts, 1 100+ point win against a rabble of a football team.
Xerri (79) – Big X-man has well truly made the #1 ruck mantle his own so far in 2022. Essential.
Duds
Neale (86) – Sooo many coaches trusted you with the Captaincy Lachie, you were up against 22 cloud-pointers for heavens sake! Did roll his ankle in Q2 and salvaged his score late but this one hurts for coaches…
Rayner (62) – Nothing new here from the overhyped spud himself – that’s 3/3 in the ‘duds’… You’ve got to do better in a team that wins by 100+ where each player averages 81 fantasy points!
Ziebell (49) – This game was perfectly set for Ziebell to go bonkers… D50 peppered the entire night and Brisbane kicking 18 points, there should have been cheapies galore! Perhaps North have moved on from the ‘chip it to Ziebs in the pocket for him to pound the ball as far away as possible, only for it to return 30 seconds later’ tactic. Anyone who didn’t fall asleep watching them want to fill us in?
Carlton vs Hawthorn
Studs
Cripps (138) – How about that for a ceiling?! Crippa has gone to another level in 2022! Had a massive 52 points in Q4 when the whips were cracking… 31 disposals, 6 marks, 11 tackles – the complete game from a midfielder!
Doch (138) – Boom! How good is it to see Doch fighting fit again martialling the troops down back?! 33 touches and 13 marks… He’s always had the capability to go massive and Sunday arvo was one of those days.
Hewett (119) – Flying under the radar and getting the job done week-in, week-out! Coaches had concerns when Carlton were fielding a full-strength midfield, they were all in on Sunday afternoon but it didn’t bother Hew one iota!
Walsh (112) – A classic Sam Walsh game typified by his gut running and ability to get from contest to contest! Much like his mates Crippa and Hewett, feasted on a Sunday picnic of points!
CJ (110) – The excitement machine that is CJ lit it up, breaking the lines with his trademark pace and penetrating kick! I couldn’t see him challenging for a top-6 defender spot but nice draft slider!
Sicily (101) – Sic Dawg had a 4 minute patch where he want na-nas and scored 28 points on his way to 101! Just another one John’s Juggernauts will live to rue… surely due for a putrid 50-60 or a brainless suspension?
Duds
Mitchell (87) – The pig is 3/3 <100 points for the first time in a long time! Will bottom out in price soon, make sure you are ready to pounce…
Cerra (70) – The one Carlton midfielder who missed out on the feast of points in the engine room! You’d be spewing if you own…
Wingard (61) – Speaking of spewing…
Maginness (30) – Apparently there was some preseason hype for this guy? I still don’t know what he looks like and we are three rounds in! Irrelevant.
St Kilda vs Richmond
Studs
B.Crouch (128) – The Brad Crouch of old was in full flight with a massive 120+ score… He has some serious scoring pedigree and knows has never lost his ability to find the footy!
Short (118) – If you traded after round 1, I am gobsmacked you still play Fantasy… Roamed around and did what he pleased of half-back with 27 kicks and 8 marks. Had a lot of disposals that had bugger all impact on the game – fantasy gold!
King (93) – Big Max has arrived. Again came up clutch for the Sainters when the whips were cracking in Q4… I would not pick him this season but credit where credit is due!
Duds
Marshall (66) – Predictable… Paddy Ryder back in the side and look what happens! Marshall spent more time forward, pinch hitting in the ruck and it showed in what was an ordinary fantasy performance…
Bolton (64) –
Hill (46) – Wouldn’t pay an overpriced pie and coke let alone >$800K for this artichoke for a footballer! You’re supposed to be a ‘silky ball user’ Brad – you had 15 disposals, 7 of which were handballs and still only went at 60% efficiency – mind-boggling!
Gibcus (38) – Seriously Josh… I’ve gone in to bat for you so far this year yet you continue to put up 30’s… Disgraceful. Wouldn’t trust him on field – so glad I could bench him this week!
Freo vs Subiaco/Swan Districts (West Coast)
Studs
Hurn (116) – There were whispers throughout the game that Hurn’s arthritis had flared up… he and his joints managed to hold up for a 20 kick, 12 mark game!
Acres (110) –
Naish (90) – Naish was thrown a lifeline by the Eagles – fair to say he has repaid them (and Fantasy coaches) thus far! Many of us were put off by his inflated price-tag… enjoy the epic cash generation if you did it – will surpass $500K in the coming weeks!
Duds
Switkowski (57) – Somehow rated ‘elite’ by champion data… not sure what they were smoking! An average performance from an average player.
Tucker (52) – Another guy who was hyped in the preseason… was supposedly set for more midfield minutes? Fyfe, Mundy and Serong all out and Tucker could barely scrape a half-ton – pathetic.
Hough (37) – What’s the name of the competition below the WAFL? Probably where Hough will end up when the Eagles get all their players back!
Petrevski-Seton (36) – Speaking of 3rd grade… Would be lucky to stand out in an Auskick Pro game.
The Juggernaut Review
2021. Not horrendous but not exactly making inroads either! Could it be an omen that I am in for an indifferent year such was 2021?!
They say that AFL is a game of inches… I’d argue it’s exactly the same in Fantasy. I had 3/3 league wins again this week but it could have been oh so different!
Here was the state of affairs heading into the last 11 seconds of the Saints vs Richmond match in one of my leagues against my mate Tom Millo (elite team name by the way Tommy!).
Bolton of all people has a shot from the boundary with about 15 seconds to go… I am crossing my fingers he puts it through to get the ball back to the middle. Sure enough, he holds up his end of the bargain and with 0:11 on the clock, the butterflies kick into overdrive! Steele finds himself in the centre bounce, and what happens next would have been made 10x better with Titanic music.
0:07 – My man Jack gets a shoddy, questionable handball away and the Saints go forward with a rushed kick!
0:03 – Short collects the loose ball and has the last kick of the match for good measure! Here’s how it finished:
Another week, this one doesn’t go my way and I am sooking about how the game sh*ts me and everyone is being rage traded and/or on the chopping block! Fantasy can be awesome but also a piece of sh*t at times.
Thanks again legends and share how you went in the comments!
Yours in Fantasy,
Fantasy Fanatic #70
Fantasy Fanatic 
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