Mixed bag… that’s my two word description for The Weekend That Was. We had some monster scores from bonafide guns of the competition coupled with some very average performances across the board! Add in a couple of injuries and you have a weekend of liquorice all sorts – in other words, a standard weekend for Fantasy coaches. As always, plenty to unpack!
13 down, 10 to go… Time for The Weekend That Was!
Richmond vs Port Adelaide
Amon (122) – The only notable big score on the night… with bugger all Fantasy relevance, you can tell how Thursday night went for coaches!
Judson Clarke (64) – The kid with no first names came in and did a massive solid for owners on debut! Looked comfortable at the level, kicking 2 snags… Coaches far and wide will be praying he holds his spot next week. You know you are really scraping the barrel when a score of 64 is worthy of a mention in the ‘studs’…
Wines (72) – What is the opposite of fine Wines? Sh*t grape juice…? I don’t know but this was grim for those who jumped on after the R12 bye! Surely he’ll turn it around at some point, make sure you are ready to pounce and reap the rewards!
Butters (55) – Burnt Butters for the 30% of coaches who still own this clown… Didn’t make things any better when he had a head clash with Jonas late in the game! Like Jesus, was somehow was ready to come back on 5 minutes later without a concussion assessment… didn’t know Kochie was club Doctor?
Bolton (54) – 0.5 including one of the all-time bloopers! Ran into an opening goal and someone missed when it was probably easier to kick the goal… inconceivable.
Slim Dusty (43) – This effort was slimmer than slim… slender? Can’t believe I am saying this but is irrelevant in season 2022!
Gray (26) – Okay, Robbie will go down as a Port great when it is all said and done but if he keeps this up he is borderline robbing (pardon the pun) a young fella of games… I’m sure Cornesy will toss in his two cents at some stage!
Carlton vs Essendon
Doch (135) – Wowee! The trying conditions made absolutely no difference to Doch who feasted on 33 disposals, 9 marks, 4 tackles and 0 spoils! Great trade target fresh off his bye – owners will be pumping up their own tyres with good reason!
Shiel (123) – Nice stats sheet for Dylan but he isn’t doing anything to shake off the “footsteps” gag from Luke Parker about a month ago…
Cripps (106) – Single digits in the 1st quarter and coaches were probably “happy” to settle for another mediocre 70-90 point score… Crippa showed that you can’t keep a man of his quality down for long in an elite resurgence!
Merrett (88) – That was quite possibly the most unconvincing 88 I have seen in my life… Imagine if Zezz actually pulls his finger out! Symptomatic of where this rabble is at.
Boyd (38) – Good rooks this week seemingly as rare as hens teeth… D8/heartbeat on life support at best!
Marchbank (35) – A little rough on Caleb after he made his long-awaited return following a 1000+ day layoff between AFL games… Unfortunately, you could be out for 58673621 days and you probably still wouldn’t avoid a mention in the ‘duds.’ In all seriousness, welcome back Caleb. Will be better for the run and be a key cog down back in the absence of Weitering!
Parish (30) – A bit to unpack here! So first Parish pops up midweek on the DT Talk podcast and gives himself and the entire basket case a pump up… Then we get a stirring 150 year reunion tribute in the pre-game… Then we get a listless, lacklustre, conditional effort like that… Where’s those 100+ scores you promised Darcy?! Perish-ing in front of our eyes after he struggled through a calf complaint and was eventually subbed out in the 2nd half.
Stringer (20) –
Freo vs Hawthorn
Brayshaw (141) –
JOM (134) – Jaegerbomb winding the clock back with a huuuuuge 30 disposal, 7 mark, 7 tackle, 1 goal game… Not really fantasy relevant but credit where credit is due… take note Tommy Mitchell!
Sic (100) – Another ton, another feature in the ‘studs’ and yet another week of yours truly being a salty non-owner. Like clockwork.
Mitchell (70) – Just when we thought the pig was back he drops a 70 from 28 possessions… genuinely hard to do! At least he is still accumulating pill but needs to get back to filling the stat line. Go ahead a rage trade but obviously reverse!
Callow (40) – Genuine Phil In. Seemingly both in Fantasy and real life!
St Kilda vs Brisbane Lions
Neale (127) – Sadly I didn’t get a glimpse of this game with M*A*S*H (channel 9 Gem!) on the telly at the pub in Bowral… But let me guess, Lachie ran around the park basically doing whatever the f*ck he wanted again? Anyone who tuned in care to elaborate?
Lyons (126) – This could have been enormous if he kicked straighter (0.3) on the night! 2% ownership and <$850K… tempting given we know what Jarryd is capable of!
Crouch (110) – The man just keeps getting it done! Takes his season average to an elite 105… I may be a bit biased but a criminally underrated season Crouch is putting together.
Sinclair (105) – Just another 30 touches (26 kicks) and 4 marks for the specimen. Gee he’s a sight for sore eyes so lets hope he keeps dining out on possessions!
Zorko (67) – Arrrgggh… To the Fantasy community, specifically Zorko owners, I owe you an apology! Bring him in a month ago for him to go on and average 72… Then in the game where a ton was on the cards, the old hammy starts playing up and he’s subbed out in Q3. F*ck I love this game…
Windhager (39) –
Owens (11) – Blimey. I hope you had more than 18 green dots otherwise this score is counting for you… After such a promising 95 in R11, comes out and gets concussed and subbed out on a paltry 11! Will miss the final bye week where squad depth will already be tested.
Norf vs BWS
Himmelberg (161) – Proper bonkers! Has moved to half-back over the past three weeks and his number have lifted immensely. Question is – can he sustain this form and are you in a position to take a huuuuuge gamble?
Cogs (130) – Joined in the absolute pile on with 34 of his own to go with 6 marks and 3 goals… genuine pisstake on a Sunday arvo @ Marvel in front of 55 fans! Has to be strongly considered for non-owners with a 3 round average of 119!
Whit (130) – That’s more like it Lachie! Owners would have been borderline hard watching Whit rack up completely needless cheap +6’s in the last quarter… Peak fantasy!
Wehr (72) – Unreal! Coaches were holding their collective breaths heading into Friday with Wehr named in an extended squad… he then holds and peels off another solid score – legend! Watch the $$$ roll in.
JHF (29) – Sheesh… not a great week for JHF! First he goes and ‘likes’ a ‘fake trade’ post by 7AFL then proceeds to play probably his worst game of the season… he was quieter than the 55 faithful that turned up to watch them! Now he has been suspended for 2 weeks following a crude roundhouse to the jaw of Josh Kelly…
Ziebell (22) – *Shakes head in disbelief*. Actually, come to think of it, not surprising at all given how pox Ziebs has been this season!
Stephenson (14) – Did someone say ‘list clogger’? Unfortunately Stepho and his chompers just about sum up where Norf are at…
Fight Club vs Collingwood
Oliver (146) – 43 touches, 7 marks and a goal in a losing effort… If anything this is great news for owners, knowing that you can beat Melbourne despite Oliver getting off the chain. A worthy winner of the Neale Daniher Trophy irrespective of what the toothless one-eyed flogs have to say!
Brayshaw (127) – Was huge across half-back for the Dees and I genuinely think they would’ve lost by 7 or 8 goals without him… Despite putting in a massive shift, brother Andy still gets the choccies this week!
Daicos (114) – Genuinely taking the P155. It seemed like every defensive transition went through Whisper… Coaches may need to change plans to ditch Daicos with his bye this week. 33 disposals, 6 marks, bulk handballs received, several kick ins – Fantasy gold!
Crisp (111) – Death, taxes, and Crispy getting up every week for bulk fantasy points. ‘Lock and load’ in every sense of the phrase! Did you know, since round 4 has a low score of 99… Bonkers and non-owners clearly lacking brain cells.
Big Mason ‘Telescopic’ Cox (101) – Ho hey! Where did that come from?! Imagine if he could do this with some form of consistency… Imagine! Certainly benefitted from Gawn running at about 20% but credit where credit is due!
Petracca (86) – 3 game average of 71 tells you everything you need to know… Still confident he bounces back – non-owners, be ready to pounce on an under-priced gem!
De Goey (70) –
Gawn (67) – Clearly was playing sore but this was a reeeaaal letdown to those who trusted big Max with the C… Not such a happy birthday for the Queen after rumours spread she also skippered the big man! The bye comes at a good time.
Turner (27) – Some would’ve backed in young Turner with sh*t all rooks available… Sadly, he was subbed out in Q3 after a nasty headclash with Jamie ‘Billy’ Elliott. More defender rookies woes, who would’ve thought?!
Just as an aside… well done everyone for getting around the ‘Fight MND’ cause. Was great to see the MCG packed with royal blue beanies and kudos to Neale and the Daniher clan – an inspiration to so many!
The Juggernaut Review
1683. Yeah sure, it’s not catastrophic and despite the spud farm that is the Juggernauts, went up 1K in the rankings. Don’t bother asking about my league match-ups… you loyal followers know the drill there!
Just had a look at the rankings and the points are in, yours truly is currently 1663 points behind the 70th placed coach. Hahaha it’s honestly beyond a joke how far I am back at this stage – genuinely drink bleach worthy!
Albert Einstein once said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
So what do I do?
(A) Continue to let recent instances of being burnt by players influence my decision making – case in point:
Picking big Max over Clarry Oliver as captain to throw away a grand total of 79 points! Fair to say I was scared off by Clarry’s 91 (as C vs Traffic Cones) about a month ago… Clarry has gone on to average 127 in the past month including two 140+ monsters!
(B) Continue to hold my best M8, Zac F*cking Butters. He’d be lucky to reside at M10 for most owners at this point…
Anyway, onto what we can control, and that is how we attack our trading with one week of byes to come. Once again, coaches should be looking to maximise green dots without sideways trading premos. Given 12 teams have now had their bye, coaches are spoilt for choice with options all over the park! Some more clever bye round trading will set you up nicely heading into the back end of the season.
Thanks again legends and flex how you went in the comments!
Yours in Fantasy,
Fantasy Fanatic #70