Really hoping I can avoid those dreaded donuts over the next three weeks…

I love a good cash cow in AFL fantasy, not so much in the morning with Kochie…

Get your head around some of these commonly used AFL Fantasy terms and jargon with this A-Z glossary!

Bottomed Out – Getting on a gun who has reached their lowest price after a string of low scores or an injury affected score. Get on board the discounted star and watch the points roll in!

Break-out – A player tipped by many to ‘break out’ and see a dramatic increase in their output. This year you’ll hear guys like Caleb Serong and Zac Butters are primed to break out.

Breakeven – The score a player needs to achieve to maintain their current price. For example, if Josh Bootsma had a breakeven of 26, any score of 27 and above would see his price rise.  

Cash Cow – A cheapie who increases their price with good scoring, only to be sold to when they are ‘fattened’ to make money. Think guys like James Jordon, Errol Gulden and Chad Warner who were great cash cows in 2021.

Cash Grab – Nabbing a player with a low breakeven to get their price hike in the following 2-3 games. The idea is to ride the high and save cash for an eventual upgrade… doesn’t always work out as planned.

Donut – Most relevant during the bye period where teams have a cheeky holiday. Inevitably, you may be left with a few 0’s on your field. Late outs can also stitch you up with a donut if you have no emergency cover.

DPP – Dual Position Player. Any player that can be picked in multiple positions. For example, Josh Dunkley (MID/FWD) and Tim English (RUC/FWD). Provides your team with extra flexibility.

Emergency Cover – Bench players can be picked as an emergency in case of a late out. Your ‘donut’ on field will be covered by your emergencies score.

Fantasy Pig – A coveted title in the fantasy world. Not thrown around like a knighthood in the UK! Awarded to a player who goes above and beyond to feast on points. Only four ‘pigs’ are in the pen so far (Dane Swan, Tommy Rockliff, Tommy Mitchell and big Brody ‘Reg’ Grundy). For some context, Tommy Rockliff averaged a disgusting 134.8 points when he was inducted in 2014. Oink oink! Awarded by the great lads over at dreamteamtalk.com

Fantasy Piglet – A potential pig in the making, displaying pig-like tendencies with some elite scoring.  

Guns and Rookies – A team structure where a coach fills their side with proven premiums and rookies… not much in between.

Junk Time – When the result of a game is dead and buried and a player comes in and feasts on the carcass to boost their fantasy score with some uncontested cheapies. Like a seagull to hot chips on a Saturday arvo at the ‘G. In fantasy, these guys are worth their weight in gold!

Mid-Price Mayhem – A strategy whereby coaches fill their side with mid-price players in the hope they will all go to the next level… Don’t be surprised if your scoring is as inconsistent as my sh*t after curry night.

Mid-pricer – Based on this year’s salary cap inflation, I’m running with any player valued between $350,000 to $650,000. These guys can be the difference between elation and heartbreak. You know what they say “You get what you pay for…” 

Never Again List – A player who has burnt you in the past, so you chuck them on your ‘never again list.’ Chances are this player will rub salt into the wound by going out and dominating when you don’t own them…

POD – Point of Difference. Players with <10% ownership. This could be your chance to get a leg up on the competition by picking a unique player who you feel can elevate their scoring output. Alternatively, you could choose to avoid a popular player (i.e., a player with >25% ownership) forecasting that they their output may be average or sub-par. Many of the better teams will be stuck with a player performing poorly whilst you can reap extra points or better use your cash elsewhere. 

Premo (Premium) – A proven, reliable fantasy scorer who can be trusted to get you bulk points most weeks. Based on this year’s salary cap inflation, I’m going with players who in general cost >$750,000.

Rage Trade – Trading out an underperformer early in the week out of pure disgust to send them a message, only to reverse the trade prior to lockout because you know deep down, you picked them for a reason and they will respond.

Rolling Lockout – Season 2022 will see the return of the rolling lockout where players will only be locked at the first bounce of their match in each round.

Rookie – Any player valued <$350,000. For context, the 2021 #1 draft pick, Jason Horne-Francis will set you back $290,000.

Samson – In tribute to Richmond big man Samson Ryan who played a full game and somehow managed negative fantasy points (-2 back in round 15, 2021). Genuinely hard to do!

Set and Forget – Selecting a player with confidence, knowing they will remain in your team for the season without any fuss.

Sideways Trading – A strategy whereby coaches chop and change players around a similar price, generally without improving their team at all.

Spud – A poor fantasy footballer who is notoriously terrible week in week out, think Zac Dawson (sorry Zac, but your 37.6 point career average ain’t going to cut it!). Hopefully your team won’t be looking like a spud farm come round 5! 

Tearing up the Track – An overused preseason term that basically describes every player with a pulse… don’t get sucked into the hype!  

VC (Vice-captain) Loophole – This move basically gives you a double shot at selecting a captain each week. 2022 will see the return of the rolling lockout (players will only be locked when their game starts). You start by picking a vice captain from an early game (e.g., Friday night or Saturday arvo). If you like your VC’s score, you can take it by fielding a non-playing bench player and whacking the C on them. Make sure you have a playing emergency, so you aren’t left with a needless donut! If you don’t like your VC’s score, simply chuck the C on another player.

Let me know if I have missed any in the comments below! Feel free to create your own also – remember to provide a story or explanation.

Cheers,

Fantasy Fanatic #70