Round 19… A little less carnage than round 18 but fair to say plenty of coaches were not spared (again!) leading to the fielding of sub-par players for this time of year!

Also, R.I.P. Walsh and/or Ashcroft owners.

19 down 5 to go… Must be time for The Weekend That Was!

Western Bulldogs vs Essendon

Studs

Bont (128) – Beastly. Never change Bont. I’d say it sh*ts me as a non-owner but sometimes you’ve just got to acknowledge greatness!

Libba (120) – Man for a guy with sh*t texta drawings all over his body he sure knows how to win a hard ball… I’d give him the 3 votes but I reckon the umps will find a way to give it to the Bont!

Sm(n)iff (114) – Friday night bags with Bazlenka producing the goods! All white line fever gags aside, he looked much better than previous weeks and Dogs fans would have loved his defensive intent.

Daniel (109) – Ooooft yes Caleb! Playing off half-back and being fed the footy = recipe for success. Anyone on this POD?

Parish (108) – What a man! Dug in late to get to 108 from what was looking for all money around 90-95. Absolute ball magnet – it was his 6 marks and 7 tackles that would have impressed coaches the most!

Duds

Merrett (88) – Okay so it’s probably one of the higher ‘dud’ score in living memory, but Zach, I didn’t pick you to be dicking around with 80’s and 90’s. When we’re coughing up $1m a ton is the bare minimum.

Macrae (69) –

Richmond vs Hawthorn

Studs

Sic Dawg (121) – After being chased around by a Ford last week, was back to his usual tricks not playing on an opponent, breaking all the rules of the game on his way to 10 intercept marks! Play the whistle so they say.

Taranto (116) – Phew! He was quiet early but didn’t he catch fire in the second half both at the coalface and forward of the footy?! 3 snags in his 23 touches.

Soldo(g) (103) – Actually ridiculous how VFL ruck men can just slot in and go back to back tons at AFL level. It’s all about the #1 solo ruck sitch!

Duds

Grainger-Barrass (0) –

Carlton vs West Coast

Studs

Curnow (146) –

Doch (130) – Lovely Doch! Did anyone chuck him the C?? There was an air of inevitability about this one. 29 disposals to go with 7 marks and 8 tackles.

Gaff (109) – Fair to say I haven’t minced my words about Gaff’s season… As my loyal followers know, I am as balanced as they come so deserves to have his tyres pumped up for this performance!

Witherden (103) – Under the roof? Say no more. Thriving in the most pristine of conditions akin to Sam “the Orchard” Pang! 30 disposals to go with 7 marks for Witho!

Duds

Kelly (67) – 2 point first quarter and my word it didn’t get a whole lot better after that… Premiums underperforming seems to be contagious.

Walsh (53) –

Brisbane vs Geelong

Studs

Stewart (116) – Stewwwwww! After a sub-par performance in R18, Stewwy responded with 25 touches and 9 marks. Star!

Dunks (112) – Straight back in like he never left. You imagine there will be coaches a plenty scrambling to get him back in after a two week lay off! Brissy are a better team with him out there.

Duds

Ashcroft (63) – Actually heart-breaking. News came through that the rising star has sustained an ACL injury. Wishing Will a speed recovery!

Hawkins (36) – Imagine touching the nurrie seven times and giving your own defenders a bake! Defending would be about as foreign as clean feet on a greedy pig for you, Tom.

Port Adelaide vs Collingwood

Studs

Rozee (108) – Standard Roze Royce. Midfielders who can go forward and kick snags are worth there weight in gold and Port have found one here!

Houston (106) – Great performance… Not sure about going full Bazball in the post-match borderline claiming victory, however!

Butters (105) – About time, Zak! Brushed aside midweek rumours that he would miss this clash and dominated with 31 touches, 5 marks and 3 tackles!

Duds

Mitchell (48) – Ouch! Collingwood had been managing Titch’s game time the past fortnight but I don’t think anyone predicted him being subbed out.

Wines (36) –

Freo vs Sydney

Studs

Parker (127) – 3 votes… L.Parker. Head and shoulder above the rest on the night! Not overly relevant from a classic perspective but draft owners will be prancing around with a bitta swagger.

Duds

Young (73) – Seriously there couldn’t be many other blokes more frustrating to own than this guy… Injuries, horsesh*t scores, the odd elite score – liquorice all sorts!

Warner (70) – Not the only Warner struggling at present…

Blakey (44) –

Johnson (22) – Duds popping out of the sprinkler left, right and centre in this game and it was no different for Matty Johnson. With all the forced trades, plenty of coaches had no choice but to play the likes of Johnson on field – R.I.P.

GWS vs Gold Coast

Studs

Himmelberg (112) – That’s more like it Harry! Enjoyed the elite conditions afforded in Canberra buttering up with 19 kicks and 12 marks – timely ton.

Ned Flanders (110) – I flagged him midweek as a unique flavour – he was initially recruited as a mid so this won’t come as a great surprise to the Suns recruiting department… Another 31 disposals to go with 6 marks!

Whitfield (106) – Back to back tons for Whit in pristine conditions! Fun Fact: When Whit kicks it 20 or more times in a game, he tons without fail every time.

Duds

Touk (81) – *Audible groan* Well that was one big let down, particularly given Touk had 54 halfway through the second… I’ve bought in about four premos the last three weeks, none of whom average greater than 95. Travesty!

Rowell (69) –

Melbourne vs Crom

Studs

Max (115) – He only needed 13 disposals to get to this score! Tells you everything you need to know really. He won’t kick two goals every week but I think he’ll be a reliable ton (assuming Grundy remains in the Magoos) for the rest of the season!

Brayshaw (108) – Finally a noteworthy score cashing in on the increased midfield time in the absence of Clarry. Could be a sneaky POD for the adventurous coach among us?

Duds

ROB (69) – Fair to say ROB has flown under the radar given the exploits of our main two big dogs as well as the emergence of both Briggsy and Max. Scores like these will not help his cause in gaining clout!

McVee (31) – Incredibly this is only his third lowest score of the 2023 campaign… Yeah, just let that sink in!

St Kilda vs Norf

Studs

Steele (133) – Massive. The big dawg is back doing what he does best! 33 disposals, an impressive 9 marks and a clutch snag when the Sainters were staring down the barrel of defeat.

Marshall (123) – Big Ro goes BANG! What a luxury our set ‘n’ forget rucks have been in season 2023. Genuine legend!

Sheezel (116) – Wow. I tip my hat to Sheez and his consistency and maturity well beyond his years. Clearly his scoring suggests he can match it with the big dogs so I’d tick off a hold if you have other issues at this point!

Windhager (114) – Can’t believe I am saying this but I am strongly considering playing Windy on the field vs Hawthorn @ Marvel over any one of my so-called ‘premos’. He seemed to have a role off half-back and buttered up with plenty of cheap +6’s!

Sinclair (112) – Make that six tons in his past seven fixtures… Sincs has been huge since plying his trade more on-ball and his scoring has reflected!

Duds

Harvey (23) –

The Juggernaut Review

2290.

At this point just playing for bragging rights merely making up the numbers from a rankings perspective! Add to this the typical 2/3 L’s in league matchups.

Thought bubble I just had: Do you ever just look at multiple spud merchants sitting in your squad and think to yourself “How did they get there?”

Matty Rowell for example – you play in the guts 95% of the time yet you still avoid a mark around the ground like the bubonic plague. Genuinely fascinating to watch you run around in circles until the next stoppage.

Adam Treloar – this bloke haaaaates tackling, doing everything in his power to break the record for most ineffective pressure acts in a game. On the Bullflogs, don’t get me started on how an All-Australian midfielder (my mate Jack Macrae) gets banished to a half-forward flank! #weloveBevo

Anyway, as a way of massaging my severely dented ego I’ll have you know I am (currently!) ranked in the top 200 in the Women’s World Cup fantasy… And this was with Sam Kerr Captain! Perhaps there is method to the madness of having no idea and hoping for the best?? A bit in that.

With five weeks to play, round 20 marks the final opportunity to shape respective league ladders and final positions. Those teetering on the edge of the eight – there may be no tomorrow if you don’t get up this week! As such, the strategy has to be to maximise points. If a premo is out this week I would strongly advise trading as opposed to holding to ensure the strength of your team. If you are vying for a top 4 position, a double chance has a nice ring to it! Use your judgement at the trade table and back yourself in!

So how did we all go in round 19? Flex your score in the comments below!

Best of luck next week legends!

From the trenches,

Fantasy fanatic #70

P.S. Suck Shit England Cricket Team.